The Struggle With Saying No

I'll read a book, think about all the things I need to say no to and then I say yes to all the things again.  The struggle is real.  I can't even deny it anymore.  And as I prepare to be out of town for a month visiting my parents, I realized I have to say no to a lot of things.

If you’ve been reading the blog for the past few months, you know that I’ve been reading a lot of books about saying “yes,” and learning to protect some of my time so that I am able to put my best priorities first.

I’ll read a book, think about all the things I need to say no to and then I say yes to all the things again.  The struggle is real.  I can’t even deny it anymore.  And as I prepare to be out of town for a month visiting my parents, I realized I have to say no to a lot of things.

No to more book launches even though I love them so that I can be present in my time and not stressing about the books to read and social media to share.

No to bringing all the books I want to read.  Especially when your brother says he’s bringing you a stack.

No to packing all the things. Sometimes the world is better when you travel light.

No to making plans and finding activities for every day.  The unhurried and relaxed agenda allows for more enjoyable moments.

Anyone else struggle with the silence and sitting still but me?

I found it ironic last week that when Eric had 4 days to relax and spend time with his family and we were enjoying a quiet morning with his parents and Sarabeth was getting to play with her grandparents for the first time in a long while, Eric jumped up and decided to start the projects.  We’d hardly had time together (let alone eaten breakfast because it was still in the oven) and he couldn’t sit still any longer.  His comment is very telling.

Can you tell I struggle with sitting still because I’m so used to doing house things or homework?

And while being busy isn’t all bad, chores must be done, the lawn must be mowed, and school can be awesome for learning and helping us grow, we can’t be so busy that we forget how to sit still before God.

[bctt tweet=”We can’t be so busy that we forget how to sit still before God.”]

This week saw a change in my morning routine.  Eric was tired of having to get up at 7:30 with me if Sarabeth wasn’t awake yet, and he didn’t like my theory that I could just read my iPad in the dark while he continued to sleep so I could have my morning quiet time.  Plus, we realized that my quiet time with God wasn’t actually so quiet when Sarabeth kept coming in and interrupting due to the fact that the bedroom door doesn’t latch tight even when locked.

Instead, he suggested I take over the guest room (well, maybe he didn’t suggest the complete takeover that has happened, but he did suggest I use the room).  So, Sunday morning, the takeover happened.  I spread all my quiet time things across the bed, and snuggled in to my blanket.  I love the stillness of that side of the house, and the sunshine is something I honestly don’t get in any other room.  I love the bright sunshine as I study, so this made the room absolutely perfect.  I’ve discovered that I want to get up even earlier now to have more time to sit in the stillness, the quiet, and the sunshine.

Those moments with God become even more precious when you realize the value of the stillness.  

When you realize that by saying no to some things, you may actually be gaining some absolutely amazing things.  And while each moment may not be a glorious revelation, I feel I’m able to enter into my day with a little more peace, that tends to last a little bit longer.

[bctt tweet=”Those moments with God become even more precious when you realize the value of the stillness. “]

It doesn’t always have to be a struggle.

Saying no frees me to be in the moment.  To be present.  To recognize that the world really isn’t all about me and sometimes you have to branch out and try new things in order to keep growing.

In one of my launch team books I’m reading currently, we were challenged to find small changes to make in our days that lead to new and positive behaviors in our life (I’ll share more about this book at the beginning of April.  You have have seen a photo about it on Instagram already because I am loving it so much!).

You don’t have to struggle with saying no when you have focused your heart on the things that matter most from the very beginning of your day.  When you live with your legacy in mind, you are able to recognize things for what they really are – a way to grow your legacy or something that takes you away from the things that really are important.

Practice what you preach. 

In the last two days I’ve had a chance to practice saying no.  I’ve been given the opportunity to jump into to new launch teams for new books.  Both are by authors I enjoy reading, both would actually teach me something, and potentially make an impact on my life.  But if I join those launch teams, am I choosing what is best for my legacy?  That was the question I had to ask myself, and when I had to say no because I want to be present with my family during our visit, I knew I was making the right choice for me.

My right choices are not going to be your right choices.  You have to decide what is right for you.

My challenge to you today:

What can you say no to that will bring about a positive change in your thought patterns, activities or actions?

 

Amy

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